The Sorting Hat's Egregious Error (Beta)
by honeycrips
Summary: Of the four houses in Rowling's universe; two are decent, one is pure evil, and one is snooze central. Here's what happens when four close friends get put through the wild roulette that is the sorting of the first years.


CHAPTER ONE

PRESORTED

* * *

"So what house do you guys want?"

Kevin's question broke the post meal silence that had fallen over the train cabin. Erin turned her gaze from the window she had been staring out of towards her friend, who started tearing into the wrapper of his third chocolate frog.

Her other friend, Sammi, who had been doing the crossword in last Sunday's _Quibbler_ , also shifted her attention to Kevin. "Uh, Gryffindor, duh." she answered.

"Gryffindor?" Kevin said, disgusted.

"What?"

"That's what _everyone_ wants."

Sammi looked incredulous. "You don't want Gryffindor?"

"I want Ravenclaw."

"Why?"

Kevin struggled to pull a dog-eared copy of _Hogwarts Through the Ages_ out of his sack _._ "I read about it last night." He flipped to a bookmarked page.

"And only those of sharpest mind

were taught by Ravenclaw," he intoned.

"So Ravenclaw's the smart house."

"What about Gryffindor?" Sammi demanded.

"Gryffindor's, like, the popular kid house," Kevin responded. "For loudmouths and troublemakers."

Erin felt with 100% certainty that Kevin, who was a goofball and the class clown at Crossing International Primary School, was destined for Gryffindor, but she decided to keep her thoughts to herself.

Sammi shrugged. "Ravenclaw would be okay, I guess. But Harry Potter went to Gryffindor."

Kevin sighed and shook his head. "How about you, Erin?"

"Ravenclaw," she admitted. "But Gryffindor wouldn't be too bad. Just as long as I don't get Hufflepuff." She made a face.

"What's wrong with Hufflepuff?" Sammi asked.

"Hufflepuff is the _worst_ ," Kevin said. He reopened his textbook.

"Good Hufflepuff, she took the rest

and taught them all she knew," he read.

"That's it?" said Sammi.

"It's the 'you weren't good enough for any of the other houses' house," said Kevin dismissively.

"Can't be worse than Slytherin, right?" Sammi joked.

"Shh!" Kevin hissed. He looked around, as though he was worried someone could hear them in the compartment.

"We shouldn't make fun of that," he warned, turning back to Sammi. "People are probably still.. touchy about that stuff."

There was a short, awkward lull.

"I think we'll be fine," Erin said, breaking the ice. "I read you can kind of choose what house you get. Don't forget the Sorting Hat was gonna put Harry Potter in Slytherin at first."

"Seriously though, I'll be cool with anything but Slytherin," said Sammi.

"And Hufflepuff," Kevin added.

It was then that Ian, Erin's last friend, returned from the water closet.

"Ian, what house do you want?" asked Kevin. Ian handed Kevin the Chocolate Frog Kevin had asked him to buy as he shuffled to sit down by the window.

"Oh, thanks," said Kevin. Ian tried to hand Kevin his change, but Kevin refused. "Keep it!"

"I don't really want these Knuts," said Ian. "Erin?"

"What am I supposed to do with them?" said Erin scornfully. Ian put the Knuts in his pocket.

"So what house do you want, Ian?" asked Sammi.

"I guess Gryffindor," he replied. "But I'd be fine with Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw."

"Hufflepuff?!" Sammi, Erin and Kevin shouted in unison. Ian put his hands up defensively.

Just then, the train began to slow down. Caught by surprise, the four grabbed whatever was nearest to keep themselves from falling. Regaining their balance, they rushed to the window.

"We're here!" whooped Sammi. She and Ian high fived; Kevin bounced joyously.

Erin felt a knot of excitement and nervousness roil in her stomach. It was here, the day she and the others had been talking about all summer. They were arriving at Hogwarts.

She had waited her whole life to be away from home and school, to learn about magic with her friends, and to _finally_ be able to use magic. Despite Kevin's obnoxious way of stating it, she agreed that Ravenclaw did have a reputation for being the intellectually minded house. Being a Ravenclaw would mean being surrounded by the smartest wizards and witches who would probably be very eager to explore the the limits of what they could do magically. And she deserved to be there, didn't she? She had always taken her studies seriously, she had done well in the school wide spelling and geography bees, and she was a voracious reader in her own personal time.

But what if she _were_ put into Hufflepuff? She shuddered at the thought. Privately she felt as though she almost might prefer being in Slytherin. At least they had personality. From what she knew about Hufflepuff, it just seemed so... bland. Though her parents told her about the bravery of Hufflepuff students, teachers, and alumni during the Second Wizarding War, it was always as if their lack of any interesting or unique led them to be outshone by members of another house. Now that she thought of it, the only Hufflepuff she could come up with off the top of her head was Cedric Diggity or something. Even Hufflepuff's greatest claim to glory, being the house with the second most participants in the Battle of Hogwarts, was just that- being second to something else.

Kevin jostled Erin playfully. She waved a retaliatory fist in his face. _You'll be fine_ , she thought, resolving to dwell on the matter no further. _If the Sorting Hat tries to put me in Hufflepuff I'll refuse._

Another matter she had been musing over came to her mind now. Erin cleared her throat to get her friends' attention. "Guys? I have something important to say."

The three turned to her.

"If we don't get the in the same house-"

"Aw, rats!" said Sammi, worry creeping into her voice. "I didn't even think about that."

From the looks on Kevin and Ian's faces, it was clear they hadn't, either.

"If we don't get in the same house, let's agree to hang out a lot and always have each others backs," she continued.

"Agreed!" agreed Ian.

"Oh my gosh," groaned Kevin. "We should have planned this! What house should we try for?"

"How about Hufflepuff?" said Ian.

"Ian!" said Erin.

"No!" shouted Kevin.

"I'm thinking we could all easily get in. Everyone else might be trying for Gryffindor."

"True," said Sammi.

"Ravenclaw!" shouted Kevin.

"That one might be hard if the only take smart people," said Ian.

"RAVENCLAW," bellowed Kevin.

"All our grades are pretty good, right?" said Sammi. "And we were all in Gifted and Talented."

"Well," said Ian hesitantly. Erin mulled whether she should weigh in or not. He had a point- it was risky.

"Okay," said Ian, giving in. "Ravenclaw!"

"Hoo!" Kevin hooted.

The train huffed and then came to a stop. Erin turned to the window. It was too dark to make out much. _Here we are_ , she thought solemnly. The halt was an exclamation point to the others' exuberance.

"This is it!" Kevin said, grinning ear to ear. "Hands in the middle!"

The four put their hands together.

"Friends on three!"

"No matter what," vowed Erin.

"One, two, three," they chanted together. "Friends!"

Meanwhile, under a tree shrouded in shadow a little ways from the platform, a cloaked figure watched from the shadows...

* * *

To be continued...


End file.
